Something I mentioned I wanted to touch on last week was 'Identity'
It can be hard enough deciding who you are, what you love, what to do, who to be, BEFORE having kids and to be fair, before kids I had NO IDEA. I could never settle for the 9-5 or accept the idea of working for other people all of my life. I have never been great at following rules or accepting the status quo. I want more. To do more, be more, help more. Unless you are in a full, complete management or ownership role, you can't really do that.
What could be better? Finding your passion! Perhaps like me who stumbled into it without even realising it?
Once you have found your passion (and some never do) What then? For me, I see a problem and think straight away, how can I solve this to help myself and others in the same position? I have an inquiring mind where nothing is impossible - except working at the speed I'd like to..
So back to identity. Motherhood changes this. For me, I certainly say for the better but it is still often confusing.
'Just' a Farmers Wife was a spin off from Farming Mums NZ as it grew. It started with me in the garden, renovating our rental property, recipes, doing homekill chooks and a focus on sustainability. Foraging and bottling and turning excess produce into alcohol - River Cottage style. It's now almost entirely different and I'm not sure how I feel about it.
I loved that. I love what I'm doing now too though. Working from home, balancing family and work life, working on business start ups, plenty of national travel and much less time for gardening and doing all the homesteading things I WAS doing.
Here's the other thing. The 3rd life I'd love to live is being more physically involved in farming again. Drenching sheep for days on end in hot dusty yards, weaning deer and getting covered in bruises, moving animals from paddock to paddock and working in the rain from time to time without caring about mud and mess.
So those are my 3 dream identities.
- The self sufficient homesteader, with her free range chooks and overflowing vege garden
- The semi corporate, social media marketer and entrepreneur who flies around the country to speak or learn or work. While beautifully incorporating exercise and healthy eating ofcourse...
- The hands-on farmer, knee deep in shit and wool and feeling the burn and satisfaction of a hard physical days work.
When people ask me what my page is about - I have no answer for them - Just a day in the life of me and the craziness that surrounds it. It's a bit of a jumble but it's natural, unstaged and keeps me accountable and I hope at times, inspiring.
So who am I? I'm not exactly sure but what I do know is that I am someone who wants to do everything, be everyone and have a blast doing it.
I've been called an entrepreneur (among other things haha) in the past which is a term that I find a little too flattering and it makes me furrow my brow whenever I hear it. I take it as a compliment but look forward to the time I feel it is a deserving one.
In the meantime - "Agribusiness" can cover the lot! - I don't ask for much right?
(Also, to be clear - NONE of these things means any less attention for the kids. They are heavily involved in everything we do around the house, the farm and when one of us is away it gives some valuable one on one time with the other, or the nanas for example. In reality, I am only childfree for 12 hours each week! So don't tell me you can't get anything done while having kids - it just means some creative thinking and alternative working hours ;) )
I'd really love to hear what you think. Do you find yourself juggling many balls and wondering if you need to choose one of just embrace them all? It certainly keeps life interesting!